Hold on to your incandescent light bulbs! By 2012, all 100-watt “traditional” light bulbs will be phased out, and by 2014 all 60-watters must be kaput. The replacements will be the more energy-efficient and “eco-friendly” compact fluorescent light bulbs, currently at a store near you.

 

 

I put the words “eco-friendly” in sardonic quotations because of a recent incident in my own house. While I was away, my wife called informing me that one of our cats, Ivan, had knocked over our lamp. This nefarious and rambunctious act not only broke the glass shade surrounding the bulb, but the bulb itself. I asked her what kind of bulb it was, to which she responded that it was a new, environmentally conscious, energy saving, animal-and-nature-friendly, anti-global warming, stick-it-to-the-coal-company enabling, compact fluorescent bulb! (My words, not hers.)

Herein lies the problem: while these bulbs last about 3 years—according to the American Council for an Energy Efficient Economy (ACEEE)—they are infinitely more dangerous than a traditional bulb. As anyone who has broken a light bulb knows, all you must do is get a broom, watch your feet, sweep and throw away; repeat as necessary. However, this is NOT the case for the CFLs. The instructions for proper disposal on the Environmental Protection Agency’s website are atrociously complicated, not to mention potentially hazardous.

According to the EPA, here is the proper method of cleaning this “improved” technology in luminescence:

Step 1: Air out the room. Shut off the air conditioning or heater, Open all windows, and evacuate all pets and people. Don’t let ANYONE walk through the area on their way out.

Step 2: Clean-up. After leaving the house for at least 15 minutes, scoop up glass pieces and powder using cardboard and place the fragments in a hermetically sealed container (just pick them up if it is broken on a carpeted surface…). Use duct tape to pick up the remaining fine pieces. Wipe the affected areas with paper towels, and place them in the same hermetically sealed container. If any clothing, bedding has come in contact with the powder from the bulb, dispose of it in the prescribed manner (step 3). You may keep the clothes you wore to clean it up, provided you were careful enough not to make contact with the affected area. (It does not say if you must buy a new carpet; however, one can infer that it would be a good idea.)

 

Step 3: Disposal and Transport. Place all fragments (that were in the hermetically sealed jar) in a larger sealed container. Before transporting, place kitty litter or other oil-absorbent material around the container. Clearly mark the container, “Mercury – DO NOT OPEN.” Place the larger container, which contains the hermetically sealed jar, in a larger cardboard box, and place in the back of your pickup or car. Transport to your nearest recycling center. If you must transport in the passenger area of a car, ensure you keep the windows down.

The reason for all this precaution is contained in the previous paragraph. Notice the warning of mercury. Each bulb contains about 5 milligrams of this neuro-toxin in its twisting helixes, which can be very harmful to pets, small children, infants, and women who are pregnant (which my wife happens to be). This amount of mercury can also be harmful to other adults if directly ingested.

Besides being a threat to life and the repeated interminable inconvenience the clean-up, disposal, and transportation of hazardous waste poses to individuals throughout the country, there are other arguments against this federally-mandated anti-choice imposition. Assuming the ACEEE calculations are correct, the average cost per month for the price of an incandescent bulb is about $0.071 cents per month. On the other hand, the cost for a 35-month running CFL bulb per month is about $0.057 cents per month. Over a year, an individual will save approximately $0.16 cents per year per bulb (a total of $2.50 in my house’s case). Additionally, the New York Times has reported that many people find the bulbs rarely last that long, so the savings become even more negligible.

Granted, it is worth noting the savings in energy use is greater than that; however, consider that nearly 650 million light bulbs are sold in a year. Even if we assume the increased life-span of CFLs decreases light bulb sales by 50%, this would still put nearly two tons of mercury in our landfills, or worse, in the homes of those ignorant of the highly complicated cleaning procedures. Critics of this argument claim that coal plants emit more mercury (0.023 milligrams/KWh) when they produce the energy required to power incandescent bulbs; however, this mercury is dissipated into the open air—an infinitesimal fraction of the atmosphere—while home use and recycling concentrates the mercury in our households and landfills.

Fortunately, my wife, unborn child, and pets are okay, although my cats have been unusually frenetic recently. I successfully cleaned up the unavoidable mess and disposed of my entire inventory of CFLs, which ruined a better portion of my day. I will now begin my hoarding of incandescent bulbs (until it becomes illegal, anyway…).